Here you go.
Of all the funny things I've heard about Urban Meyer's decision to step down as head coach of the Florida Gators, my favorite has to be my friend Patrick, who said "Maybe Meyer's wife found him in bed with Tebow." I also enjoyed this former coworker of mine's assessment: "I can't wait to wake up tomorrow to find out Urban Meyer's signed a 10-year extension with Florida."
When Meyer decided that the day after Christmas in the middle of three bowl games less than a week before his team played in a BCS bowl was a good time to announce he was stepping down at the end of the season, he pretty much pissed me off because I had to divide my attention between my football team's seeming inability to tackle in the open field and this clown.
Now, having wasted brain space considering the many things that must be wrong with him to make such a weird, noncompetitive decision, I find out that he is not quitting after all. What is wrong with this person?
Maybe before you announce to the national media that you're quitting, you make a firm decision. I think that's wise. Not that the national media has ever allowed me to make announcements.
But I really don't understand what's going on in that pinhead of his (seriously, it's tiny -- take a look).
First, by nature college football coaches at real programs spend their lives under pressure. I get that he's under pressure, although I should point out he's got the top quarterback apparently ever (Superman wears Tebow pajamas, as you'll recall) and a team that's been steadily kicking ass every year. So his stress is slightly less than, say, a coach with much less talent, booster money, etc.
Second, by nature college football coaches at real programs have to be incredibly, insanely competitive to survive in that world. And if you're not you wouldn't have gotten to the Florida head-coaching job. So I guess it's just confusing to me that you decide in the middle of bowl season that the stress and the chest pains that come with making millions of dollars and outcoaching nearly everyon in America is too much for you. Where do you go from here?
Apparently, you just go to the islands for a few months to recharge, let your offensive coordinator do the hard work, then come back and take over the reins when you feel like it. Which if I were that OC I'd be pissed...but anyway.
I'd also like to draw your attention to this nugget.
We all know I take a special joy in the latest Southern Cal NCAA violation that they then inexplicably get away with.
This one is slightly more fun, though, because I really like that the guy who was dumb enough to set up the star back with a 2006 Land Rover (oh I mean his girlfriend, who is a single mother who pays $500 a month on the car because that's a reasonable amount for a 20-year-old girl to spend on a car every month when her family can't qualify for a loan) also happens to be out of his mind. Either he thinks that we're dumb, or he's dumb. But either way I think the highlight of the story is his company "USC Marketing" he says stands for United States China Marketing. If that's true, which it is not, it is then the worst name for a marketing company ever and no one would ever want to market their products in either of those countries through that company.
And I'm spent....
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