Let's define a hold, since apparently Big 10 officials are unclear.

So I just watched ND lose to Michigan. I am clearly not pleased with this game, for a variety of reasons.

Charlie Weis's playcalling in the Irish's final possession was terrible -- two minutes remain and you decide to throw twice, thereby allowing the clock to stop after each incompletion. Super smart.

But more than that, if Michigan is curious who to thank for their big win, I think that should go to the Big 10 officiating crew who handed it to them. I am not big on excuses, but I would like to point out several things:

1) ND was called for holds throughout the game, which is fine. A hold, for those uninitiated, is when an offensive player uses his hands while blocking. I am in no way saying ND didn't hold. What I'm interested in is why Michigan holds were so rarely called. Here's a sure way to know there's holding taking place: there's a gigantic hole, and no one seems to be even remotely in the area of the runner. Or you are watching the game and you see a lineman literally grabbing the defense. Yes, you saw a lot of that when Michigan got big runs.

2) Excessive celebration by Armando Allen. You tell me that what he did isn't something you see on a regular basis in all college games, and I will eat my hat.

I am actually too angry to even point out that the clock changed from 11, to 10, to 9 seconds when the ball was untouched on the kickoff. And I'm also too angry to explain why Boubakar Cissuko (who was destroyed by Michael Floyd today) should have received several pass interference penalties.

Suffice it to say I will now be rooting ever harder for the earth to open up and swallow both the Ohio State and Southern Cal teams today.